Month: November 2014

Stats Guy

Dave entered the bus after the late girl’s basketball game at Waynesboro. He found a seat near the front, close to the coaches and prepared to nap on the ride back to the quad. With getting back to the university around midnight, he would not be done with figuring out the statistics until two or three in the morning. So he wanted to take advantage of the opportunity to sleep when he could.

The girls filed onto the bus and when Kim went past, he noticed that she gave him a strange look that he could not identify. Well, that could wait, he thought. He would ask her about it at the next game. After everyone had settled down, the trip home began.

Shortly after the bus began to move, Kim called toward the front of the bus, “Dave, we want to see you about some statistics.”

“Yeah, we want you to come back here,” her close friend Diane added.

“Oh, all right,” Dave replied sullenly and got the stat books together and headed back to where the girls were. He found Kim and Diane seated together about three seats from the back.

When he prepared to sit across the aisle from them, Diane said, “No, Dave, sit between us,” and moved into the aisle to allow him to sit down. He slid onto the seat and she squeezed in beside him.

He started to open the stat book and asked, “Well girls, what stats did you want to discuss?” “No, not those, silly,” Diane laughed as she took the books from his hand and placed them on the seat across the aisle. He looked bewildered and queried, “Then what ones do you mean?”

“We meant some performance statistics of yours,” Kim quietly answered, sliding her hand up along his leg to his crotch.
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Birthday Bang

It was a boring evening. All I was doing was stare at the television in a blue funk. The Mets were losing; crime was up, and much like my love life, the stock market sucked. Nothing new or exciting. And then the telephone rang.

I answered it to a woman on the other end. “Hello,” she said, “This is Mary. Is Kevin there?”

How nice! I thought, a sweet sexy sounding woman’s voice to talk to. But she was asking for another guy.

“Sorry, ma’am,” I answered, “but you’ve got the wrong number.” I hung up. But that voice stayed on my mind and I wondered what she looked like.

Minutes later the phone rang again. When I answered it I was surprised and pleased to hear her voice again. She asked the same question. Only this time, I thought I would be a bit flirtatious, and see what happened.

“No, Mary…. Kevin isn’t here but if you don’t mind my saying, I truly love your voice and I’d love to entertain you even though I’m not Kevin.”

She laughed at my response and asked my name.

“I’m Roger. But you can Rog.”

She giggled a little and said, “Well, Rog. Your voice sounds pretty sexy.”

We ended up talking for hours that evening. We learned a lot about each other. Mary told me that she was a 39- year-old office assistant and part-time personal trainer at a gym franchise. She explained that she just had her divorce of 5 years finalized and that she was looking for her friend, Kevin, to spend a few hours with to relieve her of her misery.

However, our telephone conversation managed to do the trick. I kept Mary laughing and in a good mood. That one evening turned into a daily, 2-hour telephone conversation between Mary and I.

Two weeks after our first conversation, Mary called feeling depressed because it was her birthday and she didn’t have her husband or friend to spend it with. I suggested to her that I would be happy to take her out for her birthday. But she said, “Rog, I am a bit older than you baby. I doubt that we would have anything in common.”

I am 25 and work as a department store manager. I explained to her, “But Mary, this doesn’t have to be a romantic thing if you don’t want. This is a simple Happy Birthday ‘get together’ to bring in your 40th birthday.”

She was somehow convinced so we agreed to meet at a public location and celebrate her birthday. But I had a great surprise for her.
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